Christ came to proclaim the good news to all, women and men, young and old, rich and poor. Christ calls all to follow him with greater integrity and maturity.
When Christ began his public mission to all, he began by selecting a small group of men and called them into an intimate friendship with him and one another in a particular way.
Friendships among men have a unique spiritual quality. Men in healthy relationships with one another discover a powerful natural ability to collaborate and work together for the good of those for whom they are responsible. One can think of the natural fraternity that exists among soldiers, first responders, sports teams, and fraternal organizations that allow them to work together for the good of others.
When they are at their best, fraternity among men leads them to a deeper understanding of themselves and the world that Divine Providence has placed them in. Fraternity develops a man’s skills, abilities, and personal resources allowing him to better respond to the needs of others. “Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another.” (Proverbs 27:17).
Men yearn for this friendship with other men. But these friendships are undervalued by our society. Very often men are often overburdened by their cares and responsibilities to invest in developing their friendships with other men.
The loneliness men feel in our society can often lead them to filling the void by other unhealthy behaviors and relationships. On the other hand, the light that fraternal charity brings is often the key to finding freedom from unhealthy habits that many men in our society find themselves trapped in.
A men’s group isn’t rocket science! Simply put, a men’s group is nothing more than a group of men who are committed and intentional about building genuine friendships with one another and living their faith together.
In men’s groups, we support those who are struggling and celebrate when God’s grace brings new insight and greater freedom into our lives.
Men are all different and they each have their own unique temperament and needs. They also find themselves at different stages in life. So there can be no “one size fits all” approach to men’s groups and different groups will take different approaches. It is important, then to find a group that responds to your needs.
At the same time, because of this variety of temperaments and needs, there are no perfect men’s groups that can provide for every need. Besides, it takes time to build trust and friendship. So be reasonable about your expectations. Once you find a group that will work, stick with it and don’t hop around trying to find the “perfect fit”.
Some groups meet every week, some every other week, and still others monthly. Generally, more frequently is better and groups that meet less frequently than monthly often struggle to hold together.
You’ll want to find a convenient time that men can consistently commit to. Be creative! Some groups find success by meeting very early in the morning, before the work day begins. It’s a sacrifice to get up for a 5am meeting at the Church, but there is usually not a conflict and a little sacrifice can go a long way toward fostering our spiritual maturity.
The important thing is to find a consistent time and place that will work for the men involved.
Leadership is important, but it is NOT necessary for the leader of the group to have any particular qualification or training. The leader doesn’t need to be an expert in theology or spirituality. Rather, the leader’s role is to merely to help the group stay organized, arrange for the time and place for the meetings, and to ensure that everyone stays informed. The leader can also help keep the group remain focused on its mission to foster the growth in the spiritual lives of the men in the group.
There are several programs available to guide men’s groups on their journey. While a set program isn’t necessary, they can be very helpful for groups as they start out. Some of the more popular Catholic programs are Crossing the Goal, That Man Is You, Exodus 90, and The Men of St. Joseph. You can click the links to learn more about any of these programs.
Keep in mind that a program is only a helpful tool, but it is not the group. If one program isn’t meeting the needs of the group, try something different, or no program at all. Maybe read a book together, or study the scriptures together, or the catechism. The key is the faith sharing and intentional living out and growth in the faith together.